What is important?

What is important to the family? That is what I start with when I first see a family. Most of the time their child hasn’t been eating or gainng weight for quite some time. It is a constant battlefor every bit and every ounce. Why don't they eat? You HAVE to eat...why doesn’t my child? There are multiple reasons why a child doesn't eat. But what is important to the parents? Is it the weight gain or the types of food they eat? Is it that their child sit and eat with them at a meal. Most of the kids I see the parents have been told that their child is not gaining weight. The majority of parents feel that it is a direct reflection on their parenting. I find that it is much easier to help the parents by decreasing their stress about their child's eating habits and concentrate on what the parents are doing right and what is normal for their child and other children. Toddlers, special needs or not, are a HANDFUL!!! But fun...